Occasionally among the glut of terrible reality shows on Foxtel, a true gem is uncovered. Sandwiched between Pawn Stars, Hardcore Pawn and all those other ‘cleverly’ titled reality shows is the epitome of glorious schadenfruede: Ink Master.

For those uninitiated into the world of competitive tattooing, the show rounds up tattoo artists to compete for $100,000 and the title of “Ink Master”. Each week they complete a free tattoo on a willing canvas, they’re critiqued, and one competitor is eliminated every episode.

For one thing, it’s hosted by Dave Navarro of Jane’s Addiction who looks like he was born to be the Wikipedia thumbnail example of ‘rock star’, and he really doesn’t do much but look badass and make unhelpful comments. Already we’re off to a brilliant start. Another plus is that some of the tattoos that are completed are genuinely beautifully constructed, and can truly be called a work of art.However, the true appeal is when artists spend five hours grinding through a piece on an unsuspecting canvas and the end result fucking sucks.

Let’s be honest, we’ve all seen lovely tattoos that work out really well and we’re bored with it ( Miami Ink is soooo 2005). Nice looking tattoos are for instagram and not worth your ridiculous subscription price or a sneaky VPN connection to a friend’s American Netflix. When a customer receives a free tattoo, is mortified beyond belief and the tattooist helplessly tries to defend it – now that’s worth spending your hard earned cash on.

The broken look when a poor soul checks out their brand new tatty in the mirror and it’s an abomination is the definition of perverse enjoyment. There’s even been one so bad that the producers decided to give the guy a free cover up on their other reality tattoo show. Cross promotion at it’s finest.

Ink Masters is up to Season 6, and over 2.1 million people watch it in the US every week, so why aren’t you getting involved?

 Ink Master airs weekly on TLC at 9:30PM

Written by Jonty Simmons